One of my clients asked me to write a new version of an existing sales page he had. My client told me later that my new version brought in 50% more sales than his previous version.

On this page, I'd like to show you three things:

  1. Proof that my version of the sales page achieved a 50% increase in sales.
  2. A link to the live sales page
  3. A line-by-line explanation and analysis of the sales page so you can understand why it worked and how I think when I write copy
     

(1) Proof that my new version of the sales page increased my client's sales by 50%


Below is a screenshot of a conversation I had with my client on Upwork.

In this conversation, I ask him how my new version of his sales page performed.

He responded by saying that it increased sales by 50%.

(CLICK THIS IMAGE TO ENLARGE IT)


(2) Link to the live sales page


Click here to see the entire sales page

 


(3) Explanation/Analysis of the sales page


(Note: In the images that follow, I have added the blue boxes and red numbers to aid in the explanation.)

Pre-Head, Headline, Intro

 

  1. I wrote this pre-headline to grab the reader's attention and provoke their curiosity. After reading this pre-headline, most readers will ask themselves, "What does he mean he'll pay for my cookout?" and they'll want to read on to find out.
  2. This headline is a pure opportunity play - it's a steep discount designed to attract lots of people who want a chance to save a lot of money. Only my client's customers were being driven to this sales page, and since they are already familiar with my client and his products, I decided to push the greed button and the desire for a great deal button in people's minds. The last words of the headline, "(This weekend only!)" are setting up the scarcity and letting the reader know that this a limited-time offer. This is good to put in the headline, because it adds urgency and can make the reader read this sales page now instead of later because they know they don't have forever. The job of any headline is not to sell anything, but to make sure the reader stays and keeps reading NOW, because if they don't read now, it is unlikely they will ever come back.